To my 23,417 feline followers, especially my many cat cousins residing in Virginia and Ohio, immediately above the picture of yours truly, providing that your browser is properly configured, you will see the latest addition to the El Camino Del Monte (ECDM) glamping experience – a 15 x 13 FT INSTANT SCREENHOUSE. The purchase of this newest piece of glamping equipment was politely requested (read as: ‘ordered’ or ‘commanded’) by my big cat Blondie. As you can see, it can be set up adjacent to the ECDM covered lounge and relaxation area. It is large enough to cover an extended length picnic table and it protects glampers from sun, rain, and bugs. Blondie insists the screen tent is the perfect solution for comfortable outdoor activities.
Whatever! If it makes Blondie happy, Fuzzy and I are well advised to support her quest for glamping excellence. And that brings me to the question of whether Ol’ Fuzz Face is really up to the task. It’s well understood in the Serendipity Farmhouse community that Fuzzy can be quite methodical and analytical. In fact he lives by what he calls his ‘Fundamental Laws of Analysis.’ In fact, he does have a fairly good professional record of following his own rules. But … …
There are some days when Fuzzy gets out of bed that it’s obvious that he has been taken over and possessed by his inner-dork.* Monday April 12th was one of those days. It was apparent from the time we rolled out of the SFH estate in our Class-C RV that he was supercharged with grandiose visions of what a great trip this would be. When we arrived at Shenandoah River State Park and finished setting up, he could no longer contain his excitement. This would be the day he would have his chance to instantly set up the new 15 x 13 FT INSTANT SCREENHOUSE.
He sprang into action. He pulled the INSTANT SCREENHOUSE from the ECDM storage bay and immediately removed it from its carrying case. He hollered to Blondie, “Get the camera! The world has to see a real expert at work!” Meanwhile, I sat at the screen door awaiting the inevitably inevitable to happen – and so it did.
Within minutes, it was apparent that Fuzz Face was on the path to defeat. His impatience and ill-conceived confidence had got the best of him. His first mistake was that he didn’t follow his fundamental laws – he had not read the traffic, he had not read the directions. And that brought on the near disaster we see below. He had no clue of what he was doing. First he tried working from the outside, but nothing seemed right. He could be heard muttering to himself, talking to himself, reasoning with himself, and, all the time, never going back to consult the instructions.
Then it happened! The monster he had made lured him inside, swallowing him whole, and threatened to consume him entirely. He battled with this ravenous creature. He struggled and pulled tent legs. He grunted and groaned. He let out gasps. He had started to sweat and their was true panic and terror in his face. The monster had him almost completely entrapped.
Guardian angels exist. Fuzzy’s angel was well aware that Fuzzy needed saving, but …. only after he had learned his lesson. At the right moment, Fuzzy was inspired to withdraw from the jaws of the beast. He finally considered that it was time to read the instructions. Once he had done that, it was only three minutes until the INSTANT SCREENHOUSE was fully erected. It is beyond me why Ol’ Fuzz Face seemed so satisfied with himself once the tent was set up. His inner-dork was still there and presented a dorky smile on that fuzzy face.
Now, Fuzzy wasn’t the only one to commit a grave blunder that day. While Blondie was taking pictures of this most ridiculous affair, she made the mistake of laughing at Fuzzy and asking that question that husbands never want to hear, “Why don’t you read the instructions?
Fortunately for Blondie, I interceded on her behalf and persuaded him to reconsider. He took my advice, recognizing that his sweet Wife is the heart and soul of Serendipity Farmhouse. – – And at that moment of truth, Fuzzy’s inner-dork departed and never reappeared for the remainder of the trip. As you can see below, Ol’ Fuzz Face did a much better job of taking down the screen tent and storing it in its carrying case.
My Last Digs: I like Ol’ Fuzz Face, but when that inner-dork overcomes him, he loses all common sense. Even if he hadn’t read the instructions, he should have at least seen that the picture on the carrying case clearly showed what the screen tent should look like when erected. Also, just prior to him being swallowed by the tent beast, he should have seen that the tent was inside-out. The logo and other writing was backwards.
*Dork: a silly, out-of-touch person who tends to look odd or behave ridiculously around others; a social misfit